Just Witnessed the Craziest Shit Ever!!!

2:00am. After watching the most epic, thought provoking episode of Lost with Edmond and Jim, we ventured out to the porch to smoke a cigarette, and talk about what we just watched. In the middle of conversation as we're coming up with possible theories, we hear a strange noise coming from the alley twenty feet away. Everyone gets quiet for a moment as we look up the street and listen closer. Just then we see a car come flying through the alley going at least 60-70 miles an hour. It hits the street that separates the two connecting alley's and bottoms out. Sparks fly as the car turns 90 degrees and literally (no exaggeration) flies across the street sideways, and lands on the other side where the next alley starts, and we here a loud CRASH! A couple seconds go by, and we see flashing lights from up the alley, followed by a cop just behind him.

Our minds still trying to comprehend what we just witnessed, we hear "get out of the car now, hands on your head!!" Not knowing if the dude was still alive, or if he crashed into someones window in the apartment complex, I run inside to grab my iPhone, and this is story, and video reaction to the aftermath we witnessed.


Tyrell Martin lays face down in the middle of the alley. Hands cuffed behind his head. The cop stands above him with his flash light condescendingly asking where he was going, and that he should have thought about "that." By this time, we have walked across the street, to get a better view of what the hell just happened, as he had crashed on the same side of our house. Tyrell tells the cop he only had one beer. We try to hold in our laughter, which probably sounds of the muffled variety, where you're not sure you should be laughing, or what exactly you just saw. We then hear him say he was about to go in the Navy next month, and that he had the highest scores out of everyone.

As the cop continues his apathy towards Tyrell's well being, he notices us standing there and stops his taunting, to pull him up by the cuffs, and put him in his car. As he walks by the crumbled front end of car he just wrecked, we hear Tyrell say, "she's gonna kill me man, she's gonna kill me!" While he's walking away from the wreck, we start to walk back inside ourselves, and see the huge telephone pole he smashed into, leaning completely sideways. Later we realize, he broke the bottom of the huge pole, and knocked it completely out of ground about six feet, where it somehow stood standing.

We venture back to our porch to grab another beer and watch what happens next. A few minutes go by, and eventually 10 cop cars show up. Obviously the highlight of their night. We hear them laughing, and joking, while the guy sits in the back of the cop car. None of them seem to give a shit about whether he's seriously injured or not. They shine their flash lights at the telephone pole, and finally realize what it took three drunks to realize ten minutes ago. That they should move their car, and stop standing under a huge telephone pole that's about to fall on them.

As the paramedics finally show up, a good 30 minutes after a man crashed into a pole at 70 miles an hour, they casually get out and stroll over to the cops to share some laughs. A few minues later, they finally decide to bring the guy out of the cop car to have a look at him, and see whether he's close to death or not. Miraculously, he seems ok. Half the cops leave, probably to score some free donuts at 7-11, and the remaining officers gather around to interrogate the suspect, and see how much info they can get off him.

They then proceed with a series of impressive sobriety tests, which Tyrell naturally fails. They ask him where he was coming from, and what he's been drinking. He tells them, "Steel Reserve" and that he, "only had two." They then have him lean his head back, and say "stop" when he thinks 30 seconds has passed. Tyrell starts counting out loud. The lead officer tells him not to count out loud, but he does anyway. Failed that one. They move on to the next test. They tell him to count down from 75 to 55. These cops have really improved their tests. Next they have him spell out the alphabet. Not backward, but forward, and he has to thoroughly pronounce each letter. As he inaudibly goes through the motions, he sticks his hands out as if to say, "no no" and then he bows apologetically, and motions for them to hold on and give him another try. Failed that one. Then they tell him to put his arms at his sides, and walk slowly toward the lead officer, taking big steps, and lifting his leg high in the air. Tyrell naturally starts doing so, as the officer is showing him what he is supposed to do. The cop tells him not to start until he says so. He keeps trying to take a step, but almost falls over. The officer finally gives up. Failed that one too.

They finally take him away, for what will surely be a completely different direction in life than the one he was on. We venture back inside, having witness the craziest episode of lost ever, and the craziest shit we've ever seen in person, of a car not twenty feet away, flying at high speeds across the street sideways, and crashing into a telephone pole/wall. Nice welcome to the new pad.